Co-Dependents Anonymous (CoDA)

CoDA Resources

What is Codependency?

Sometimes it happens in life that we need others to an unhealthy extent. We need them to think and feel on our behalf. So much so that all our happiness and the very core of our existence lies in the presence of this other individual. This excessive dependence on another individual on our part to just exist refers to co-dependence. It is unhealthy, and we need to address it.

Why was Co-Dependents Anonymous (CODA) established?

Co-Dependents Anonymous (CoDA) was established in 1986 in Phoenix, Arizona. The founders of CoDA are Ken and Mary Richardson. They were both previously members of Al-Anon. Somewhere down the line, they realized they also had codependency issues that needed addressing. Thus, CoDA was born.

Co-Dependents Anonymous is active and thriving in more than 40 countries today, with millions of members attending CoDA meetings. Its purpose is to help all individuals who have had a dysfunctional childhood, no matter what the reason.

The Twelve Steps of Co-Dependents Anonymous:

1. We admitted we were powerless over others – that our lives had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood God.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
7. Humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings.
8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood God, praying only for knowledge.
    of God’s will for us and the power to carry that out.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other codependents, and to practice
    these principles in all our affairs.

What Happens at a CoDa Meeting:

• All CoDA meetings begin with a Serenity Prayer. People usually address each other by first names and similarly introduce themselves. In many meetings, each identifies themselves as Co-Dependent.
• There will also be readings from Co-Dependents Anonymous literature such as the four "Foundation Documents" – Preamble, Welcome, 12 Steps, and 12 Traditions are a significant part of each CoDA meeting.
• As a “Seventh Tradition,” donations are sought for literature printed, rent, etc.
• It is optional for people to share their life experiences. Others are encouraged to listen without offering comment or judgment.
• Finally, the meeting ends with a Serenity Prayer or the “CoDA Closing Prayer.” Some might read “the Promises.”
• People sometimes go out for coffee and to share more with fellow CoDA members.